Two thoughts too strong to outrun.

Two thoughts too strong to outrun.

Thought One: Lies

My first thought was about lies. Lies are so essential in our lives.

We accept them to drain our wallets.

We accept them to drain our spirits, our souls, our selves.

We accept them from those we love and honor in a desperate trade for respect.

We accept them from our leaders and they seem to accept them from each other.

Lying, making up a reality, does not make it eventually true.


On either side of the lie, in the very different realities that we are presented with and live by.


“They are not trying to solve the murder, they are trying to justify it.”


They are not trying to solve a problem or reach a solution but they listen to anyone, any thing that fills in a reality puzzle they have created.

I guess that is why people post pictures of cats and babies and puppies on social media.

They don’t lie. Like the weather and cats and babies and puppies don’t create a reality.

They just are what they are…


Thought Two: Change

Bunny watches the TV News. Maybe she watches too much News. But much of it has seemed to fall into place. She sees a cloud. She sees a dark cloud in the future. Puzzle pieces are being defined. Decisions are being made in the background, far from the masses. Puppet strings are being trimmed. Corners are being prepared for the weak and helpless to back into.

Things are falling into place.

Just a few years ago, American Politics associated with Communist party officials would have been derided.

Just a few years ago, money spent to keep diseases at bay, away from those who struggle just for bare essentials for life, is now derided as a scam.

Just a few years ago, if a candidate would have uttered any words considered racist, sexist, ageist, classist, they would have been shown the way from the stage.

Just a few years ago, we had untouchables in our society, people that preached unbased fears, hate, separation of the races, and supremacy of one race over another, were held back arms length and mocked.

Just a few years ago, acting contemptuous of those whose bodies shake without control, whose choice of Gods to respect, whose skin is different, would not have been tolerated by the Tolerant and would never have been cheered by any but the most extreme.

But some do cheer, some call for blood and separation and some fail to recognize how this has all happened before.

But for Bunny, it seems all too clear. We are being set up to lose, to fail, to fall. The outcome of the speeches are useless. They just keep us occupied. They keep our eyes and spirits diverted, while evil waits patient at the sidelines.

The evil is patient and Bunny sees the change coming.

Thoughts about a spirit two years gone.


Mr. Williams,
Sorry to see you go, but I am not sure we deserved you.

Maybe less then than now.

You were nothing more than just us, unbridled, unfettered by fear or self-consciousness. Two years later, your spirit faded and I think we need the smiles you bring more than ever.

It is all dissolving. It seems to be evaporating.

You could express. Nothing held it back. You had none of the fences that we use to line ourselves, to hold back our expression. It just gushed from you. You were just us and if you had a talent, it would be to let some of it bubble, some of your energy, bubble to the surface and it was so free, it made us nervous.

We laughed, but you made us nervous.

Some of us thought, you would explode, but there was never a chance of that because you had released. Your spirit was freed. When you smiled, you smiled, when you hugged, you hugged. When you shook a hand, you shook a hand. What frightened us was that you were you and we were you. You just knew how to let it go.

Everyone talked yesterday about your demons. My thought that morning after you moved on, was that we were the demons. Maybe not intentionally, but we were the demons.
When we failed to express, when we failed to hug true, when we failed to smile. We were the demons.

As the world has gotten smaller and smaller and we can see, in a second, in a digital flash, a thousand children dying, we are the demons. When we can see the twisted hate drawn from fountains of love spirit from Gods we have chosen to follow, we are the demons. When we see the blood spill again and again and again, we are the demons.
The demons may not have been inside you, the demons that forced you to the next step may have been us. I think you knew inside that when you were “on” that it was an “on” that we all had, but we chose rarely to be “on.”

There was no magic to you.

The only magic was that you had pulled down some of the barriers, some of the fences that were built around each of us to protect us from each other and maybe from ourselves. Like this Social Media, we often think about how we will appear to those around us, carefully choose the pictures of a baby or cat or the dance of an elephant.
We are so close. We have all the opportunity that you did, but maybe we really are the demon.
I understand we are not Picasso, Hendrix, Van Cliburn, Einstein, or many of the other great expressionists that have filled our history. But you were different. You absorbed the energy and vision around you and then allowed your mind to roar like a gushing river of thoughts, sharing with us every thought from Margaret Thatcher to seeing a 3D proctoscope in a table vase and a mouse eating cream cheese. These are all images we know, all things that we had all been exposed to, but we hold them back and our failure to express, to tear down the dam and rip down the fences made us the demons in your life.

I just thought about the Heinlein book, Stranger in a Strange Land . Maybe that was you. Maybe on the next stop in the journey, expression will be as common as breathing and there will be no demons.
Someone remember to hug someone today. Remember to tell them you love and remember to be true and share a gift of a feeling. Tell someone the first thing that comes to your mind. and then the next and the next and never be afraid that they might think that you are weak, because you can crack open the dam and just let it flow.

Don’t be a demon. We have too many.

Maybe less then than now.

6 Minutes…


What happens in 6 minutes?

  • In 6 minutes you can grab a bowl of cereal and start eating.
  • In 6 minutes, you can read about 2 pages of a book, 1 page if it is a book you don’t like.
  • In 6 minutes, you can brush your teeth and rinse. Scan your e-mails, scramble an egg, order a Big Mac & fries, pay and get your food.
  • In 6 minutes, you can have sex…twice. You can make your bed.
  • You can drive about 1 or 2 miles out of your driveway, maybe 6 miles on a open highway.
  • In 6 minutes our Commander in Chief can wake up, be told about an impending attack , grab the biscuit with the launch codes and set dozens of nuclear missles into action.
  • In 6 minutes, we can begin the unstoppable process to kill millions of people. Millions more will die of painful radiation poisoning in the next few days.

    In 6 minutes you can pray, dance, jog a half mile, pull a slot machine handle about 40 times.

  • In 6 minutes, you can smoke  cigarette. delegate two projects on your to-do list, sort your mail and trash most.
  • In 6 minutes, 60 people will die of a variety of causes and about 25 babies will be born.
  • In 6 minutes you can imagine how many innocent people will die if the Commander in Chief pushes a missile launch button.
  • In 6 minutes…to can read this blog post…maybe twice.
  • In less than a minute you can vote.






After Trump, What?

After Trump, What?

What if in a collective American Growl, we scream


What can we expect?

I have been worried about this phenom for awhile.

I go back and forth on which Presidential Candidate will convince the voters to put he or she into office. I am fairly convinced that neither would be ideal. But without a doubt, one candidate would be less of a disaster and besides, we survived President Bush…twice.

But something else has been worrying me if the candidate I have settled on takes the office. It is not that I am concerned about how Donald would survive the loss. I am worried about his supporters.

I was struggling about how to begin this blog entry and I watched a campaign stop and stump speech  of Donald’s Vice President choice. A woman gave her name and told the VP Candidate that her son was in the Air Force.

The crowd surrounding the woman and the stage cheered and waved their signs. They went wild with appreciation for her son’s service to the Country and then as she continued her question the Mr. Pence, she asked how he can tolerate what she said was Donald Trump’s disrespect of American servicemen.

The patriotic cheers rapidly turned to hateful boos. The microphone was grabbed away and it is apparent that the lone woman was concerned because the crowd had turned ugly so quickly.
She hurried back to her seat.

A few months ago, demonstrators at a Donald Trump Rally were knocked to the ground, kicked, punched and the crowd cheered the beating. Two black men were being escorted by Police from an arena when one was blindly cold-cocked by an old man. Rather than stopping him, the crowd cheered.

A Protester sucker punched in Tucson, violence in California, New Mexico.

And everywhere there is violence, the Trump Supporters cheer wildly.

UNFILTERED CAMPAIGN COMMENTS AT A DONALD TRUMP RALLY <<<Click here but be forewarned it it not pretty!


I am not foolish enough to be blind to other acts of violence at Trump Rallies committed by  the opposing side. They throw eggs, jeer to drown out the speaker, throw barriers. They demonstrate.

But I don’t see many instances of Anti-Trump individuals or organized protesters being cheered on like what happened at the Pence Rally where the crowd went from patriotic to angry as soon as they heard the words “Trump has disrespected.”


Without pause.


No I don’t worry about Donald Trump winning. As I type, it seems that the Donald is rapidly decomposing like fruit in a bowl…

The Rapid Decomposition of a Candidate




(Ahhh. Compost…American compost. certainly symbolic and certainly feeds the seed.)

No…what I am worried about and have been for awhile…what happens to all the snarling disgruntled…people…he has assembled?

Other candidates have come and gone. Some have headed out to Peace Marches and demonstrations. Some have stood behind other candidates with similar positions. Some have just left… the process…the system…even the Country. They had it and they left.

But I wonder about those who have gathered at the altar of the angry candidate. I don’t have much respect for them, I realize that.

Do they head back to the bowling alley?

Do they get season passes for NASCAR races or destruction derbies?

Maybe they just grab a 12 pak and fire up the grill, cursing that the whole thing was rigged anyway. I am a bad person and contributed top the Social Media melee. I called his Supports “educationally challenged”, and his campaign “post-factual.”

I am a bad person.

Or maybe not…

These people scare me. Especially since the Donald is foreshadowing his retreat by dropping hints that he will not debate and he figures he will lose regardless:

First of all, it [the primary season] was rigged, and I’m afraid the [general] election is going to be rigged. I have to be honest. Because I think my side was rigged,”

he said last week of the Republican primaries….

“If I didn’t win by massive landslides — I mean, think of what we won in New York, Indiana, California 78 percent.

That’s with other people in the race, but think of it.”


If that is not a foreshadow, I don’t know my foreshadows.
And if he just walks away, will that be even worse?

I figure if he appears to try hard to win and loses, I am scared of how the people the Donald leaves behind will mutate. And if he walks away in a red-faced feigned frustration, an overwhelmed Champion, a Blue Collar Billionaire who desperately tried to “get their country back” unsuccessfully, I am scared of how the people the Donald leaves behind will mutate.

Where do they go? What do they do?

What if Adolf had been unsuccessful in being elected in Germany? What would the Brown Shirts do? How would they act out their disappointment?

Sadaam Hussein? Idi Amin, Slobodan Milosevic,  Lee Kuan Yew ( look him up…people loved that dude!) Kim Jong-un (OK, maybe not him…)

This selection above all had devoted following. The list had almost achieved god on earth status and their followers would have gladly fallen on a sword, a sharp stick or even willingly hopped into a volcano at the Ruler’s command and as we know they would have no problem “executing” any wish…even when the beloved Ruler had fallen from power.

What will the cheering, cold-cocking crew The Donald has assembled do if their candidate fails to become the Captain…no Admiral of the Ship of State?

I can only imagine.




My Pronouncement of an Evil F. Bunny Love

Bunny,you have filled the world around you with care and love.
I have seen the needy and the lost and the most beautiful spirits come to you just to share.

You never speak of yourself, but others always see the smile, see your glow of love.

I didn’t deserve you when we met, I don’t know if I deserve you today, but I am working and earning your love for tomorrow.

You make me better, stronger and I love you like no one I have met on this Planet.

To Susan , the one who puts the Evil in Evil F. Bunny.

If somehow Love was a tangible thing:

If Love were a diamond, you would have a hard time walking with your ring.
If Love was a house, it would be so big there would be rooms you would never have time to visit, or look out at views from their windows of waves and mountains and morning’s horizons.

If Love was a smile, your cheeks would hurt.
If Love was a trip, you would never unpack.

But the love from me, is just the love from me.
Everyday I wake up, I have to thank you for my life you saved.

Everyday, I wake up, I think one of the most miracle day in my life, is when you walked into my office and you said yes to lunch. Everyday, I remind myself of the guy at Bill and Deborah‘s wonderful Pool afternoons that said “So, you married up!”, because he could not believe someone like you would put up with someone like me.

For everyday you let me worry about the dopey things, about food and plans for the Burn.

For everything I have learned from you, for being the spirit that I take so much joy in sharing this journey with, for everyday you let me repeat myself and then give me a little smile when I say something new.

For that smile, I look for everyday. Thank you.
I am amazed that while I age and slowly decompose, you get more beautiful. I am amazed at your bravery, to face the pain and the healers that promised that they can make it go away. And you smiled and made others feel better.

I am amazed that you give me another day of life with you.
You know today, I would give you the world, a life free from worry about everything that piles around us, as if bullshit could find no other place to hang out but with us. I promise we will shake this bullshit magnet. Like a Scotsman told me once on a rainy night

“These things were sent to try us.”

We have been tried.

Today, I would make you smile and show you that waterfall we never managed to find on Maui.
But today, I can only wish you a Happy Birthday and all I have to give to you is the love of a sorry ass hippie, who knows you are the world and you mean more to me than the most beautiful sunrise with a million shades of love, or the best iced tea on a hot day or a infinite sky of sparkly diamonds.
Happy Birthday Susan from me and from all you make smile and from all you will bring a smile that you have yet to meet on this trip.

Hugs to my Bunny!


No Answer…so I suppose more spilled blood.

Recently a poster on Social Media, a parent of young children, a writer and a person pretty much just like me said he was scared.  He wasn’t scared for himself, but his child, his family, his friends. He spoke of the how he did not want to acknowledge the goals of this group of cult serial killers, but he did not want to put him family in jeopardy, Whether it was a slaughter in Orlando, in Paris, in Brussels or slaughters in Orlando, he expressed being trapped and mostly confused as to

“What exactly do these murdering fanatics want? “

I tried to read your post last night and made it half way through. It was late and I didn’t have the energy. I watched an interview with one of our retired Generals trying to explain how Islam was not a religion, but that the text, the Quran, was a political guide.

Political is defined as

“of, for, or relating to citizens”) is the process of making uniform decisions applying

to all members of a group. It also involves the use of power by one person to affect

the behavior of another person. “

I thought about what he said and started my early morning by responding to his post and beginning to formulate an answer.

I think as you do, starting with “What exactly do these murdering fanatics want? “

At first, I was reminded of the scene in the movie Independence Day when the President asks an Alien “What do your People want?” The Alien’s response is simple.

We want you to die

I thought how the General tried to link all followers of Allah and Islam with the violence and anger of the Quran. The Christians had their Bible and is loaded with murdering the unholy, with stoning of infidels, the acceptance of slavery, the obedience of women etc. etc. and the it is almost a copy of the Quran, pulling out sections, even names and places. Both provided a way to live on the land with the goal of worshipping a True God, both rejected the notion of working hard to improve your life here on Earth because the true paradise of heaven was the reward.

It was heaven. Heaven was the realm of God. These lands were of the fallen. These lands were of Satan and the fallen angels. This was hell. For the believer, Earth was a waiting room waiting , waiting piously until you are called to join God and Allah.
The Talmud of the Judaism was the same way. It told its followers how to live, what to eat, what to avoid, good moves, bad moves and reward awaited not on the accumulation of wealth and mammon on Earth, but to worship God and wait to be called from the waiting Room.

But the murderous Fanatics are no more representation of the Quran and a billion Muslims around the World, then a Abortion Clinic Bomber or the members of the Westboro Baptist Church who carry signs at Military Funerals that read GOD HATES FAGS represent the billion Christians. Both are mutations. Both are wrong. And surprising their numbers are few (100,000 Isis, 120-150,000 zealot Christians compared to billions of believers.) But they are noisy and deadly and they attempt to rule with fear and blood.

Christians “rewrote” or generated an addendum to their Bible to accommodate the Rulers and Kings that had begun to populate the land a few thousand years back, so that we as just people would follow the King and worship him, bow to him in the road when we passed, paid our taxes and willingly gave him or sheaves of wheat. And we bowed, and tithed and obeyed until it came our turn to go to Heaven and live the rule under God. We had a entity to worship in the afterlife and two entities to attempt to balance between while we waited on Earth.

The Old Testament followed the edicts of God, the addendum taught us the words of Jesus and somewhat a complacency.

The New Testament (Koine Greek: Ἡ Καινὴ Διαθήκη, Hē Kainḕ Diathḗkē) is the

second major part of the Christian biblical canon, the first part being the

Old Testament, based on the Hebrew Bible. The New Testament discusses the teachings

 and person of Jesus, as well as events in first-century Christianity.”

But it still begs your question: “What exactly do these murdering fanatics want? “

I don’t know. I don’t want to be an apologist for them, but I think we tend to confuse murdering maniacs like the crazy in Orlando or this mentally ill teenager in Munich being treated with the murderous zealots of ISIS, Al-Qaeda, Boko Harum, followers of Aum Shinrikyo, the KKK and so on and so on.

These are Cults. These are Cults of Personality and hate and blood and supremacy and they may carry religious texts but these cults have little connections. Again, I don’t want to be an apologist for their actions, but in a recent blog post, I recounted literally millions of massacres around the world, just over the last 100 years where Muslims and the followers of Islam have been killed. Even our own President said that in retaliation for massacring 3000 of our citizens on 9/11 we would respond. And over 1,000,000 Muslim men women and children that had nothing to do with the fanatic mass murder were killed.

And the killing goes on. And groups like ISIS, murder our children whether they had planned it or not, Groups like ISIS take responsibility and strike out at the West in twisted retribution. It would be like Blacks in our country killing Whites because we enslaved them for over 100 years. In response to the spilled blood, we would scream “But I never owned a Slave??!!”

Well the frustration you fear…maybe you are screaming along with millions…”We never slaughtered millions of Muslim people.”

I don’t know a resolution. I am reminded of an old Western Movie when the good guy and bad guy meet in the little town and one says “This town ain’t big enough for the two of us…” and the gunfire starts and someone dies.

Maybe our planet just is not big enough? Maybe we should have been tolerant or not unleashed a billion guns or maybe we should have focused on schools and not war, taught love instead of filling prisons, built families and not walls and   that kill children.
Maybe we must keep it in mind and kill the 100,000 maniacs like we cut out the cancer cells, change our lifestyle and pray the cancer never returns.

God…I wish I had an answer. I am sorry for your fear!